Keep self-doubt in check

       Vision can help you make tough decisions with confidence, dispelling your self-doubt. Vision can influence and aid in all aspects of life, including parenting, sports, leadership, and other skills that you want to improve.

       I coached my son's sports teams since he was five. Vision was always an important component of my coaching. I used vision to determine what I wanted to accomplish during the season for myself, and for the players. During the season, I used my vision to keep me on track as both positive and negative events occurred. The following was my coaching vision:

  • To spend time with my son
  • To help the players attain their individual and team goals
  • To provide a fun and nurturing environment for the players
  • To teach the values of teamwork, sportsmanship and commitment (try your hardest - do your best)
  • To develop the players' confidence in themselves and in their ability to function as a team
  • To use sports as a metaphor for life
  • To improve players' skills

       In my early years of coaching T-ball and minor leaguers, the kids played to learn the skills of the game, to have fun, and to be with other kids. Winning wasn't a big deal.

       As my son got older, competition and winning became more important. When I began a new season, it was easy to look at the big picture of my coaching vision: develop skills, self-confidence, teamwork, fun, and so on. However, as the season progressed, the outcome of the game affected how I felt about myself as a coach.

       My wife can attest to the difference in my mood after a game that we won versus one that we lost. After a win, I was always positive and upbeat. After a loss, I struggled with self-doubt about my ability as a coach and would be in an emotional funk. However, in the end, my vision consistently relieved my self-doubt and thrust me back into a positive frame of reference about coaching.

       This takes some time. I didn't "just remember" my vision and instantly get my negative reactions under control. I usually had to go through a process that took a day or more. Talking with my wife, family, and others leads me back to my coaching vision. Eventually, was able to again recognize my real reasons for coaching. I would then go into the next game revitalized, focused, and with clear intention about my role as a coach.

       By being an Everyday Visionary, you have a safety net that protects you when your thoughts and emotions become unbalanced. Your vision is a touchstone that reminds you of what is truly important about your activities when things do not happen as you want. I hope that one day I'll be able to immediately connect to my vision when I get out of sorts. In the meantime, I have a clear vision and can find ways to remind myself of it when life throws me a curve ball-even if it takes me a couple of days.

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